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Sunday, 8 November 2026Vol. 1 · No. 1 · Price: one objection

The Object Daily

We object. On principle.

The News Exchange

  • Politics 28%
  • Sport 15%
  • Culture and entertainment 11%
  • War and conflict 9%
  • Crime 9%
  • Society 9%
The whole flow →

Editor's choice

The editor has laid out the page personally, in the editors' own order, with “Britain should not rejoin the EU but apply afresh as a new country with no account history” at the top. Nobody else in the newsroom agrees with the order.

Politics09:42 GMTDisagreement: 3 out of 5

Britain should not rejoin the EU but apply afresh as a new country with no account history

The prime minister's talk of rejoining assumes our old membership can simply be reactivated. Anyone who has tried to recover a dormant email account knows otherwise.

Everyone else
Rejoiners call it overdue, Leavers call it betrayal, and Westminster agrees it will be a long, bumpy road through Brussels.
The Object Daily
Britain's original membership is too old to recover, and the only sensible course is to apply as a brand-new country with a clean history and a fresh password.
I disagree.Read the objection →

A club genuinely capable of bending the rules would not have left Nottingham to the sound of home supporters requesting a weekly fixture.

From today's editionCity's defeat at the City Ground is the best evidence of good governance English football has seen →

Politics09:41 GMTDisagreement: 3 out of 5

The briefing room has always been a cage fight, so it might as well have judges

Critics fear that a fight promoter at the podium would turn the White House briefing into a brawl. They have not been watching closely enough. It has been a brawl for decades. What it has lacked is a scorecard.

Everyone else: Appointing a cage-fighting promoter as press secretary turns the briefing room into a circus and signals a combative, unserious White House.

Three ways to disagree

The reasonable one
A scored contest rewards whoever performs best on the day, not whoever tells the truth. The briefing would simply swap one kind of evasion for a more athletic one.
The bureaucratic one
The Government Accountability Office has no budget line for ringside judging. Any secondment would need a memorandum of understanding, which would itself require a briefing to announce.
The absurd one
Under the ten-point must system the press corps would have to make weight. The White House canteen would then become a matter of constitutional significance.

Nobody can recover the account because nobody remembers what it was set up to do.

From today's editionBritain should not rejoin the EU but apply afresh as a new country with no account history →

Technology09:40 GMTDisagreement: 4 out of 5

Machine-written complaints should be answered by machines, and Britain should take the afternoon off

The nation's inboxes are filling with chatbot-composed grievances. Rather than filter them out, we should hand the entire correspondence to the machines and leave the room quietly.

This is the reflex of a country that has been handed a perpetual-motion machine and asked whether it comes in beige.

Everyone else: Chatbot-generated complaints are an abuse of the system that wastes public money and must be filtered out.

But it is the first improvement to British public services in living memory that needs no recruitment, no training budget and no new building in Darlington.

From today's editionMachine-written complaints should be answered by machines, and Britain should take the afternoon off →
The Object Daily Statistics OfficeFeels right. If you don't check.Demonstrated probity by margin of away defeat

Points on the Object Daily Probity Index

Each additional goal conceded away from home makes a club measurably more innocent, and a request from home supporters for a weekly fixture is conclusive.

Source: Object Daily compliance desk, calculated over a soft-boiled egg; not audited, on principle · Satire

From “City's defeat at the City Ground is the best evidence of good governance English football has seen” →

Sport09:39 GMTDisagreement: 4 out of 5

City's defeat at the City Ground is the best evidence of good governance English football has seen

The verdict is in, the season is wobbling and the consensus has concluded that City are finished. It has overlooked the most exculpatory ninety minutes in the history of the Premier League.

I disagree. I disagree. The consensus this weekend, assembled with unusual speed in studios, pubs and the back pages, holds that a guilty verdict followed by a defeat at the City Ground emphatic enough to prompt chants of "can we play you every week?" amounts to justice served and a dynasty in collapse. I have examined the same evidence and reached the opposite conclusion. The defeat at Nottingham Forest is not the end of the case against Manchester City. It is the beginning of the case for them.

Consider the allegation in its broadest form: a club so adept at arranging matters off the pitch that it could bend English football to …

Read on: City's defeat at the City Ground is the best evidence of good governance English football has seen →
Real figuresThe Consensus MeterHow many of 14 outlets reported the stories The Object Daily objects to today. They agreed most about “Trump offers UFC chief Dana White the job of White House press secretary”: 10 of 14.
  1. Trump offers UFC chief Dana White the job of White House press secretary10 of 14 outlets: BBC News, The Guardian, Daily Mail, Sky News, Financial Times, Fox News, NPR, CBS News, NBC News, Al Jazeera.
  2. Manchester City's season falters after guilty verdict and heavy defeat at Nottingham Forest2 of 14 outlets: BBC News, The Telegraph.
  3. Burnham opens talks on Britain rejoining the European Union1 of 14 outlets: BBC News.
  4. UK public bodies swamped by complaints written by AI chatbots1 of 14 outlets: The Guardian.

Source: The Object Daily's survey of the news feeds of 14 outlets

More figures from the Statistics Office →
Real figuresThe words in today's headlinesThe most common words in 220 news headlines today.

Headlines

  1. trump20
  2. white13
  3. press12
  4. secretary12
  5. dana11
  6. israel11
  7. president10
  8. government9

Source: The news feeds of fourteen outlets

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The Object Daily

The most disputed certainties

What most outlets agreed on, and what we disputed hardest.

  1. Appointing a cage-fighting promoter as press secretary turns the briefing room into a circus and signals a combative, unserious White House.10 of 14 outlets reported it · disagreement 3 out of 5The briefing room has always been a cage fight, so it might as well have judges →
  2. Justice has finally been served and Manchester City's dynasty is crumbling before our eyes.2 of 14 outlets reported it · disagreement 4 out of 5City's defeat at the City Ground is the best evidence of good governance English football has seen →
  3. Chatbot-generated complaints are an abuse of the system that wastes public money and must be filtered out.1 of 14 outlets reported it · disagreement 4 out of 5Machine-written complaints should be answered by machines, and Britain should take the afternoon off →
  4. Rejoiners call it overdue, Leavers call it betrayal, and Westminster agrees it will be a long, bumpy road through Brussels.1 of 14 outlets reported it · disagreement 3 out of 5Britain should not rejoin the EU but apply afresh as a new country with no account history →

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